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Writer's pictureAlice Dawson

Navigating Guilt and Growth: The Dual Lives of an Expat

Updated: Apr 2

Embarking on the journey of moving abroad is a thrilling yet daunting prospect. The allure of exploring new lands, starting afresh, and embracing new experiences is undeniable. Yet, amidst the excitement, a nagging sense of guilt often creeps in – a gnawing feeling that perhaps we're being selfish, leaving behind the comfort and familiarity of home.


As the wheels of the plane lift off, so too do the doubts in our minds. Are we making a mistake by leaving everything behind? Are we being selfish for wanting a different life than those we hold dear? And what if, after all the anticipation, the reality fails to meet our expectations?


From the moment we set foot in our new destination – for me, it was London – we find ourselves straddling two worlds. There's the person we were back home, the familiar faces we call every Sunday, the routines we've grown accustomed to. And then there's the new version of ourselves, navigating unfamiliar streets, facing new challenges, and adapting to a completely different environment.

The guilt of leaving loved ones behind can weigh heavily on our hearts. We question whether we're being fair to them, whether they'll miss us as much as we miss them, whether they'll understand our desire for something more. But amidst the guilt, there's also a glimmer of hope – the hope that our loved ones will support us, understand our need for growth, and cheer us on from afar as we embark on this journey of self-discovery.


And what if it's not what we expect? What if the streets aren't as paved with gold as we imagined, and the reality falls short of our dreams? It's a fear that lurks in the back of our minds, a fear of failure, of disappointment, of having to admit that maybe we made the wrong choice.

But here's the thing – growth rarely happens within our comfort zones. Moving abroad is a leap into the unknown, a step outside the familiar, and yes, it's scary. But it's also exhilarating, liberating, and filled with endless possibilities. It's about embracing the uncertainty, facing the challenges head-on, and allowing ourselves to grow in ways we never thought possible.


So to anyone grappling with the guilt of moving abroad, know this – it's okay to feel torn between two worlds. It's okay to question your decision, to worry about the unknown, to feel guilty about leaving loved ones behind. But remember, this journey is about you – about following your heart, chasing your dreams, and carving out a life that brings you fulfillment and joy. Embrace the dual lives you lead, honour the past while embracing the future, and trust that wherever this journey takes you, you'll emerge stronger, wiser, and more resilient than ever before. After all, the greatest adventures often begin with a single step into the unknown.


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